Saturday, December 11, 2010

It's just unbelievable

I think the word ‘Unbelievable’ should be banished from the English language.

‘Hey, check out this thingy, it’s unbelievable!’
‘WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHAT I AM CAPABLE AND INCAPABLE OF BELIEVING YOU BASTARD!’

Monkey colonies living in oxygen pods two miles under sea living off bananas shipped down by black marlin under the promise of monkey on land protection from black marlin predatory deep-sea fisherman.

‘That’s unbelievable!’

No it’s not, it’s the reason I am scared of eating bananas.

Angeles the smaller than fleas that come out in farts to carry away the smell after the smell has lingered for the exact most horrific and/or funny amount of time.

‘That’s unbelievable!’

Um no, it’s the movie script I am trying to sell to Disney.

Girl’s who like sex as much as men

‘That’s unbelievable!’

Um no, well ok, that one is kind of unbelievable.

But wait, check this out, tiny angles that come out of underwater monkey farts that make girls horny, that’s not only believable but something we need to get happening really soon.

Hand me my curry-enriched bananas, I’m onto it fellas.

2 comments:

  1. The money you spent on those Facebook ads might have been better spent on a course in spelling and grammar. Your "About Me" says you're an author - I just hope you've got a good editor.

    (Oh, and someone to write the jokes too. This was pathetically unfunny.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks 'Anonymous' always like when someone goes straight for the 'spelling and grammar' review. Sticklers are always the most fun people in the world. When I'm going to a party I'm always like 'fuck I hope there are a bunch of sticklers there'

    ReplyDelete