Saturday, March 30, 2013

Oh man, so it turns out abortion IS evil!

According to the good people over at the institute for Freakonomics, the huge falls in crime rates in New York City and other major US cities over the past lazy decade or three, was caused not by better police tactics, improved education or successful social polies, but is in fact directly linked to the legalization of abortion.

As the theory goes, unwanted children, often those growing up in poverty and/ or unloving and broken homes are those most likely to turn to crime, and a whole slew of these unwanted babies were instead aborted - leading to your TV still being where you last left it, your gasoline only being siphoned occasionally instead of regularly and your pants being left unpeed in due to a super scary mugging. God bless abortion!

I didn’t read this whole article, but you may: freakonomics

But here is the problem – it is also usually these types of fucked up, unloved, psychologically damaged and emotionally scarred people who both make unique, boundary pushing art and/ or seek out and support these artists allowing them to be popularized and enter the mainstream, and in their absence we’ve been left with the likes art and artists made and supported by people who’s parents actually wanted them, like Beiber, Kardashians and Twilights. Fuck you abortion!

These aborted babies may have included the people responsible for the next genre changing rock band, indie film movement or kids who would have shot the Kardashians before they got on TV! Oh no, what have we done.

The point is, if you still want to enjoy art made by the physiologically damaged then read my book - The Embarrassing Memory Murderer, it’s all about all the psychological damage I have suffered through – available in various places online including here:

Discussion points

1.     Having read this are you still pro-choice?
2.     Is using such a hot button debate point to ultimately try and sell my book awesome or what?
3.     Should I have been aborted?
4.     'Silence is golden... I swear!!!! You must believe me, please!'
5.     Was this screamed by
a.     A deranged gold miner, frustrated by all the screaming he can’t stop doing?
b.     The Goose that laid the golden egg trying not to be snatched? Or
c.      A gold necklace being tortured over where she's hiding her kids, knowing that if they are found they will be melted into bricks?
6.     The answer is C. and those kids were found and melted, and she was forced to watch.
7.     Oh my god, who thought an abortion blog could end so sad?
8.     At least you probably didn’t pee your pants today.

Friday, March 29, 2013

Tree facts

The phrase 'money doesn't grow on trees' will have a whole different meaning if all the trees die - because we'll all be busy fighting off relentless bird attacks.... The phrase 'a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush' on the other hand... I mean seriously, shut the fuck up, we're all about to suffocate to death

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

A lazy bit of comedy history for you

Commedia dell ‘Arte, or Comedy of the artist, was a form of improvised theatre from Italy popular in the Middle Ages, and surprisingly to me, as someone who has studied comedy and improvisation extensively over the past few years, not well known by people today.

As a part of carnival festivities, Commedia Dell ‘Arte was an escape from the drudgery of the type of lives the poor and underclasses eeked out, and a break from the oppression of the ruling class. It was an opportunity for people to make fun of both themselves and the rich and the royal, to blow off steam, and not take life too seriously.

Actors who performed in Commedia Dell ‘Arte would choose one of a series of stock characters, with very specific masks and costumes, routines and mannerisms, that were well known to the people of the day, as was the game, or unusual funny thing about them, which could be repeated over and over. Some of the characteristics included the quick-bodied dumb man, the dirty old man, the bad tempered hunch back, the dandy, and the vocal know it all who actually knows nothing, and are character traits which have survived all the way to today, and still form the basis behind much of the comedy produced in modern times, and everything in-between including harlequins, clowns, and vaudeville.

These characters were much like modern sitcoms characters, where people who tune in know certain behavioral attributes each character will have, which new story lines are filtered through each week, such as Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory will always respond to people in a social retarded yet ridiculously intelligent way, or Joey from friends who is always eating and saying dumb things. And I believe the sitcom Arrested Development was specifically created and designed to include one of each of the archetypal comedic characters that are popular today and seem to have developed from these original archetypes from the middle ages.

Much like the modern sitcom Commedia Dell ‘Arte would follow familiar patterns often through stock plots, and lazzies, or rehearsed comedic routines, only with improvised dialogue to allow them to remain fresh, and unique to each individual performance.

Performers would play one character often for their entire lives, so it was seemingly a craft that could always be improved upon yet never mastered. The performers were not well respected in their time, but whoever created these stock characters surely most be among the most important artists in comedy history.