Monday, March 30, 2015

Definitely Not?

There’s an old saying that I believe was coined around 18BC, which is especially cool seeing as coins hadn’t been invented yet, and this saying was on my mind all day today, even though my mind isn’t old, unless you are comparing it to a day spa, which obviously hasn’t been there very long at all, you know cause so many of them open I assume the old ones go away:

‘You can train someone to build trains, but you can’t build someone to train builds’.

I have always loved this quote. Not just because it proves the ancient Babylonians predicted the invention of the train. Nor because it proves that the ancient Babylonians knew that when trains were eventually invented people could be trained to build them. Which is in itself an amazing insight. But what makes me really love this quote is that it proves that the Ancient Babylonians also accurately predicted the lack of invention of builds. That’s incredible.

I mean think about it. Anyone can predict stuff that will one day definitely be invented, watch I’ll do it now:

-       Flying submarines.
-       Swimming airplanes.
-       Marineplane Flys.

That’s easy.

But try coming up with something that will definitely never be invented, it’s tough, watch I’ll do it now:

-       Humans made out of abandoned carnivals.
-       Really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, salty snot.
-       Stanauption.

Will those all definitely never ever be invented? Who the hell knows? I don’t know what future humans will be made of? But I’m sure we’ll run out of skin, blood, bones and pig hearts eventually. I don’t know how much salt people are snorting these days? But I am sure however much people are doing the salt is really, really salty. And what even is stanauption? It could be anything. It could even be an alternative to day spas, which will really make most of them younger than my mind older than them.

Yep, ancient Babylonians, they sure knew what they were doing.


Ps. if stanauption ends up being an alternative to coins, I totally want a cut.