Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Fix this fix

I find that everytime I have a wrench in my hand one of five things happens:

1. I fix the shit out of some piece of epically complicated machinery 
2.  I finally learn the true meaning behind the phrase 'kill a skunk, eat some string cheese, and never again be required to clean a Scandinavians boat shed' 
3. I think 'hmmm, what's a wrench?'
4. I'm finally in the mood to explain number 2 (please note I am not currently holding a wrench, so you're shit out of luck)
5. I think 'you know what, if I was a real man I could totally kill a cockroach with this.'

Lessons: 
- wrenches are fun 
- if I was in a video game that'd be totally cool
- If missionaries have sex missionary style, how do nuns do it?     
- what's a wrench?