Saturday, July 10, 2010

Powers beyond us and stuff dealy

It’s been an interesting week this week.

I finally relented and am trying a new sleeping aid this week. I try and stay away from them because if they work I become horribly addicted and then I use them too much and then they stop working and my sleep gets even worse. (Unless awesome sporting events are on in the middle of the night - in which case can't sleep, hell yeah I can't!). Anyway Nyquil entered my life two days ago, so far three great nights sleep, and three days where I can barely wake up. You know that haziness you have for the first ten minutes after you wake up when you haven't had enough sleep and consider suicide so you can jump back into it, I have that all day now. Fun! (I now understand how people watch all the crap that's on TV, it's not that they like it, it's just no energy to change the channel). I may stick with the Nyquil for a while, but then again I may also currently be a zombie and everyone is too afraid to tell me that my brains are hanging out incase I turn around and eat theirs. Also of course, one of the problems with sleep aids is for those of us inclined towards sleep walking they can increase the risks, the good news is based on my exhaustion and forehead tattoo that says “I got tattooed in Nebraska” I think I dodged that bullet.

By the way I just watched a big gangster looking black guy and a multiple head tattooed biker dude have a

“You go first”

“No you go first”

“No I insist”

Argument over who should enter a bookshop first. Hollywood can be adorable sometimes.

Plus I once wrote a novel called “face tattoo in Nebraska”. It’s about a teenager whose parents move him to Nebraska and he tries to find a way to get revenge on them but can’t figure anything out so just ends up getting a bunch of face tattoos. It’s your traditional coming of age teenage comedy romp!

We had an earthquake this week in LA. It was the second one I have felt and easily the strongest. This one felt like waves coming rolling in and apart from the surfer who splat against my window it wasn’t so bad.

Earthquakes are a weird experience here. They happen often enough that you’re not instantly scared that it’s the big one, but before you allow yourself to enjoy it you find yourself taking a moment to look around and see what could fall on you. This is where you thank god for once you don’t have a massive wall mounted TV. And it’s now that you remember that your upstairs neighbor often makes so much noise you suspect he has a pet elephant so you get to imagine what it would feel like to have an elephant crash through the ceiling and land on you. (I think it would be kind of like drowning in the sewer, you’d die but it would be worth it to experience the unique smell).

It’s kind of like when you’re taking off in a plane. You don’t believe it’s going to crash but you can’t help but pick out which flight attendant you’ll try to get to have one last hook up with, and decide which crying baby is so annoying that you’ll make a point of eating it first when you get lodged on a mountain (the answer is all of them – mmm baby back ribs).

I also went to church for the first time in years this week. My first huge big, musical extravangza American church experience! Church for me is always equal parts enlightening and inspiring, full of love and support and yet equal parts bat-shit crazy. It’s like the city bus – it gets you where you want to go quick and conveniently but you have to feel like a bag is about to be thrown over your head before you’re locked in a dungeon and forced to listen to choir music for hours.

By the way I once heard a woman in church exclaim “all you need is love” and John Lennon said that and he chose Yoko Ono over an endless string of horny groupies, and THAT’s bat-shit crazy.

Also this week Alicia Keys New York song has made me officially no longer dream of living in New York, so I need a new dream city. At the moment I am thinking Minnesota, I heard there is a heat wave there right now and I’m a sucker for a warm climate.

Besides did you know that 20% of New York residents never sleep walk into ongoing traffic – NEVER – that’s no town for me!

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