Sunday, January 24, 2016

People you know

I've been thinking about friendship today, which is weird, because I normally think exclusively about salamanders (main thought: what would happen if you threw a salamander hard at a lion?) but then something weird about friendship occurred to me, I realized something weird, that friendship is weird...

I mean the weird thing is friendship is that it's weird, because you can have a different friendship role in different circles, consider these from my life: 

- Around work friends I'm submissive and subordinate 
- Around sport friends I'm made fun of in a boisterous manner 
- Around my strong and confident friends I'm over-giving and beta 
- Around my sock puppet friends I'm a total alpha male 
- And yet when I'm with my imaginary friends I put the dolls head in the oven from ten to ten fifteen or else the next person I see in person will definitely have their head exploded by the laser from the tumor in my brains caused by my shocking insubordination 

Yep, friendship, it sure is weird. 

Now I'm off, I think I hear a lion in my bathroom, so I need to grab my salamander gloves, I've got to throw this thing before my imaginary friend Scott gets home and make me eat another pillow case, ahh man, I'm not even hungry. 

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