CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN
“Never let a likely failure stop you from striving for the unlikely success;
Quitting is the only way you can guarantee failure”
Twenty five nervous sweaty minutes went past before Ellie was standing at my door. I think we both felt a little unsure about what the greeting situation was, and subsequently both moved in to hug each other, only at different times, so that we both were able to feel incredibly awkward, then for some reason I stuck out my hand and she gave me a weird look and shook it, then I nearly ran out onto the street and jumped in front of a moving car to save myself further embarrassment.
“Do you realize some prostitute out there just asked if I was looking for a good time, she was pretty too….but I don’t think I’m really in the mood to pay for lesbian sex” Ellie said as a way of breaking our uncomfortable silence
“You got asked if you were looking for a good time by one of the hookers, one of the attractive ones…that’s so not fucking fair, I’ve lived here for over a year and not one of those girls has asked me to have sex with them, even for money, not even the one who looks like she had swallowed two or three of her past clients…why is it so much fucking harder for us boys to get laid?” I thought to myself
“Yeah, they’re annoying as hell aren’t they? I’m going to move out of here very soon, as soon as I start getting paid for my new job” I replied
“Can I come in?”
“You bloody idiot JayJay, you have left her standing on the door for five minutes while complaining to yourself that prostitutes wont sleep with you, there is a beautiful girl in your doorway, let her in for Christ sake” I thought
“Sure…sorry…come in and sit down” I eventually replied
“So I heard about this new job of yours, it sounds so exciting”
We ended up spending the next thirty minutes talking about my new animation job. Ellie was so impressed, she asked a million questions. The one thing I had been disappointed with when I went to the interview was there didn’t seem to be that many cute girls walking around the offices, it was mostly a male staff. Not that I would ever have had the guts to talk to any of the girls who worked there, if some girls did work there, which they didn’t seem to. But being able to have a perve at work certainly wouldn’t be a bad thing. Give you something to look forward to every day. That wasn’t the case though, and had disappointed me. However I was just now starting to realize, while talking about my job with Ellie, that saying you were an animator for EMK Productions was definitely a cool and impressive answer to the “what do you do for a living?” question girls seem to care so much about.
Saying “I’m unemployed and go to University semi-fulltime was never a good reply to that question. Girls react to that answer by looking at their shoes briefly before suddenly remembering that they have to meet a friend somewhere. Saying you work nights as a security guard at a cling wrap factory was never too impressive either, well I guess some security guards could impress with that response. I on the other hand was a little weenie kid, on the rare occasion anyone asked me what I did for a living while I was doing that, the response “I work security” mostly got attempts from people to stop laughing in my face. Usually unsuccessful attempts to stop laughing in my face. Followed by comments like “You, a security guard, hahahhaha what are you going to stop? A pack of children attacking the place!” Yeah imagine that, a security guard who couldn’t stop a bunch of kids, how embarrassed would that be?
Why do girls care so much about that answer anyway? You all seem to have your own careers these days anyway, why cant you have the best job in a couple? Guys don’t care. You could answer that question from us with “I torture puppies for medical research” and we would just think “Oh yeah, I’d like to play with your puppies”.
After Ellie had finally exhausted her curiosity about my new job she said “let’s watch a movie”, then pulled out ‘Brigit Jones’s Diary’ and a movie called ‘Fever Pitch’. I gave it about two seconds thought and not surprisingly chose ‘Fever Pitch’, even though I had never heard of it before.
It was an English romantic comedy about a couple who struggle to make their relationship work due to his obsession with football, and her lack of understanding how anyone could love a sporting team so much. It was fantastic.
We started watching the movie sitting on the same couch together, but on opposite ends of the couch. However somehow during the movie we had both slid towards the centre and were now touching each others legs just lightly. Even though the movie was really good, I was disappointed with it ending because I was starting to think about the prospect of putting my arm around her. Although there was some relief at not having to make my move. It’s like when you’re with a group of people, and someone suggests, “Hey why don’t we get some pizzas, and your taste buds spring to attention, and start going “Pizza! Pizza! Pizza! Pizza!” Meanwhile just as your mouth is starting to water at the prospect, everyone around you makes the decision against it, and you’re obviously too shy to speak up and say “I want pizza”, so you don’t get any. And even though you’re disappointed at this you do also feel some sense of relief at not having such a fatty meal, and therefore not having to go for a run to work in off.
“So did you like it?” Ellie turned to me and said as the credits were rolling
“Yeah it was great” I replied
Just then Ellie just sort of leapt at me and kissed me deep on the mouth and then withdrew.
“Did you like how it ended?” Ellie said as if the kiss had never happened
“Yeah it was great” I replied “So…..what was that?”
“That kiss you just gave me”
“It was a kiss”
“I know, but why?”
“Didn’t you like it?”
“I thought it was wonderful”
“Well I’m glad”
“Me too” I replied before a brief moment of silence, which I spent looking at Ellie’s shoulder, which was exposed, seeing as she was just wearing a singlet top, she spent this time twiddling with her hair, that beautiful chocolate brown hair
“You’re not upset?” she finally said
“Of course not”
“Good…I didn’t think you would be”
“So you were planning that?”
“Well just sort of….I was sitting here thinking ‘I’d like a kiss’, then I thought JayJay probably wouldn’t mind if I kissed him….so I did it…I’m glad you weren’t upset”
“So did you like it?” I asked
“Yeah…it was really nice”
“So….so…..um…..well….um….is there….is there any chance of me getting, you know, another one?”
“Do you really want to?”
“You know I do”
“I’m glad….ok then”
Then she lurched forward and sucked herself onto my face, her tongue darted in and out of my mouth, and kept darting until I regained my composure. I pulled her down on top of me and began to kiss her back, and our tongues massaged each others. She began to kiss down my chin and neck, stopping just briefly every now and again to make a moany breathy noise. Then she moved back to my mouth, and put her tongue so far inside I was surprised that she didn’t say “mmmmm did you have a sundae this afternoon?” Then she suddenly stopped and sat back up.
“That was good”
“I liked it” I replied
“Where did you learn to kiss like that?” she asked
“I don’t know, just by kissing I guess”
“Do you kiss a lot?”
“No I wouldn’t say that” I admitted, although I didn’t elaborate on just how little kissing I had done
“Me either…me and Brad haven’t really kissed, I mean really kissed for two years….I just don’t want to, not with him”
“Yeah….I guess that’s why I wanted to kiss you so bad”
“That’s the only reason?”
“Well that and I’m more attracted to you than I have ever been to Brad….and you’re so sweet and nice”
“So do you think it’s inevitable?”
“Think what’s inevitable?”
“That we’ll progress to sex”
“Yeah…do you think it’s definitely going to happen?”
“I wouldn’t say it’s inevitable…certainty desirable” I replied
“Sex! For JayJay! Inevitable? You have got to be kidding! Desirable? Ha, that’s an understatement” I thought to myself
“I think it’s desirable….But I also think it’s inevitable too”
“Please god don’t let her be teasing me” I prayed, although I don’t think god really helps you out when you’re praying that he helps you have pre-marital sex with someone else’s girlfriend
“Yeah….so how does that make you feel?” She asked
“You like the thought of that?”
”Of course…you know how I feel about you”
“I know….I feel more and more the same about you every minute I spend with you”
“I’m really happy to hear you say that”
“So” I said, not sure what else I needed to say at this point to close this deal
“Yeah so” she said “So if it’s inevitable…as we now both agree…why wait?”
“I don’t know”
“Why not just do it right now?”
“Because of Brad”
“Don’t talk about Brad…besides we have just agreed its going to happen sooner or later, why not now?”
“I can’t think of anything” I replied, I mean I couldn’t argue with her logic, if she wanted to have sex with me, then why not now?
“I’m glad you can’t”
“What next?” I asked
“This is the point where we make love JayJay”
“I think wow too”
She jumped off the couch and climbed the ladder to the bunk next to it. She was wearing a short skirt and as she climbed, from my still seated position, I could see right up it and see her g-string underneath. This meant that as I climbed up after her I had trouble not getting caught on each rung of the ladder with the front of my pants. I was slightly self conscience of this as I climbed, which meant that I didn’t see Ellie take her singlet off, and when I next looked over at her, she was sitting there looking cute as a button, with two of the most beautiful breasts in the world protruding naked from her chest. This caused me to nearly soil my pants, well I did actually soil them a little, not like a full lot, but they were suddenly very sticky down there.
I moved in and kissed her deeply. Then she withdrew from me with a smile and said “You must be hot in that big heavy shirt you have on?”, and I replied “No I’m not hot” and continued kissing her until about a minute later when I thought “You fucking loser, she was just saying that to get your shirt off”. So I stopped and pulled my top off over my head.
She giggled as I did this, then began running her hand up and down my skin. Then she began to kiss me all over my chest, it felt incredibly to have her warm moist lips on my chest. She pulled away and gave me a “Now it’s your turn” look. So I moved in and began to kiss her lower neck and then down her chest. I was too scared to go for the breasts right away, so I kissed down between them and onto her tummy. Then I kissed back up between her breasts before suddenly jumping over and attaching myself to her left nipple. As soon as I did this her neck arched back and she let out a huge breath of air.
I began to suck on it like an eight year old sucks on a lollypop after his mum says, “time to brush your teeth, you have one minute to finish that!” Her nipple hardened in my mouth and I began to roll it between my tongue and the back of my teeth. She moaned with pleasure, then breathed out “Now the other one”.
I kissed my way across to the right one, using my right hand to continue to fondle her left one. Again I felt her nipple harden as I massaged it with my tongue, and she moaned some more. She then pulled my face up to hers and kissed me so hard that I thought she was trying to get her whole head in my mouth.
She pulled me down on top of her, so that I was lying to her left and could kiss her while still playing with her breasts, such lovely breasts, as soft as two giant marshmallows. I continued to kiss her when I had a thought. “I could go for down the front of her skirt right now”. Despite the fact she had already told me that she wanted to have sex with me, I was still reluctant to do that. I mean that had been what had ruined it for me with Lisa. Actually no it wasn’t, it was my stupidity, mental note, never forget your stupidity less you commit the same mistake.
I had to do it. I moved my hand off her breasts and slowly worked it down her body. Down her tummy, over her belly button, and to the edge of her skirt. I paused, consumed with fear. “What can I do to improve my life today?” I thought to myself. “I know I can get myself some kitty cat” I realized.
So I moved my hand under her skirt, until I got jammed. It was too tight. What is it with you girls and such tight clothes, that can’t be comfortable, and it certainly doesn’t help us get down there, does it? I tried to push harder, but couldn’t get more than an inch or two in. She reached down and grabbed my hand and pulled it away. “Damn it JayJay you have fucked it up again haven’t you?” I screamed at my brain. “Let me help you with that”, Ellie whispered.
She then got up onto her knees, so her head was nearly touching the roof, and then reached around her back, and undid the back of her skirt, so it suddenly became loose around her waste. Then she sat back down and arched her back, so that she raised her bum off the mattress and in one swift motion pulled off her skirt and her g-string, she was now lying on the bed before me completely naked. More beautiful than anything I had ever seen before. Better than any sunrise, better than even Wendy at sunrise. Wendy had been gorgeous, but I didn’t truly love her, I didn’t even know her. I loved Ellie, and now she was giving all of herself to me, I was in heaven. “She must have had one of those Brazilian Wax’s that Hannah gets” I thought to myself, as Ellie’s entire body glistened from the thin layer of sweat she had now developed, with the blue light from the TV shining off her.
I moved back in to kiss her and move my hand again down her body. When I reached down towards the fun zone my hand smoothed past it and over her upper thigh. As I rubbed her leg, I felt her legs move apart as my invitation. So I moved my hand back in that direction until my fingers were suddenly engulfed with soft wet goodness. It felt like I had my hand stuck in a chocolate mousse sort of, only warm.
I rubbed my hand up and down the canyon and she moaned into my mouth. I continued to do this until a finger suddenly slid inside her and her nails suddenly dug into my back. So I moved it back and forth, and she seemed to be enjoying in immensely.
After a while of rubbing her down there like that, Ellie decided to dislodge her nails from my back, and then she grabbed me and rolled me onto my back. She then proceeded to kiss me down my chest and stomach until she was suddenly undoing my belt, and I was suddenly extremely nervous that she would find something she didn’t like the look of down there.
She pulled my jeans off with some difficulty leaving one of the pyramids of ....Egypt.... on display, with what looked like a sticky snow capped top. Then she pulled at my underwear so that my statue of Jason sprung up to attention, before collapsing back down to rest on my lower stomach.
“Now what have we got here?” Ellie said to me with a smile while looking up towards me from above it. She then began to kiss it gently, just on the tip, which felt about as good as anything I have ever felt in my life. Until she then slid JayJay Jnr into her mouth. That felt even better.
She began to slide it in and out, sucking like she was trying to suck my brain out of my skull through the head of my penis, and dripping it wet all over with saliva. It felt unbelievably amazing. It was simply incredible. There was nothing in the world that could make this not be a pleasurable moment for me. Oh of course except for my brain.
It began to occur to me that pleasure like this usually would result in a messy outcome. And I could tell this messy outcome was definitely going to be sooner rather than later. I began to panic. My dilemma of course was the age old question, “When you’re about to cum, do you tell the girl or just let her find out?”
On the one hand it’s embarrassing as hell to tell her. Especially when she has only been going for about thirty seconds, which is about fifteen minutes and lots and lots of actual sex before porno actors need to finish their experience, and that’s the only real place a guy can learn what’s normal in this situation. And if you do decide to tell, how do you say it, “Excuse me Ellie, I wish to ..info..rm you that a bucket load of my manly reproductive liquid will be with you very shortly”. That wouldn’t go down too well, I don’t think. Not to mention the fact that if I did say all that, by the time I was finished saying it, I’d be more than finished doing it.
What’s the alternative though? You can’t just spray away and talk about it some other day. She might not want that stuff in her mouth. She might prefer that it was distributed anywhere but her mouth. She might be hoping that this wasn’t something supposed to be happening at all at this point, maybe she watched porn too.
There was no more time for thought, time was not on my side, decisions had to be made, and I had made mine.
“Oh oh oh” I moaned .That actually brings me to another dilemma in a time like this. Do you moan or not. Obviously in porn, or even in normal ..Hollywood.. movies, moaning is normal. You express pleasure with voice. However that doesn’t mean its normal for someone like me. Pretty much every orgasm of my life had been had in the company of myself and only myself. You don’t have loud orgasms when you’re by yourself. I just wasn’t used to it. But as she was sucking away down there I realized that she wouldn’t know how much I was enjoying it, unless I told her some way.
So I started out by occasionally saying “That feels good”, then it started to sound stupid to say “That feels good”, so I moved onto the occasional red faced “Oh oh oh” or “Ah ah ah”. I did not sound like some beefed up man with a totem pole for his appendage getting paid to do this. I sounded like a five year old boy while his mummy puts a band aid on his scrapped knee.
Anyway “oh oh oh I said “honey…ah ah ah….I think I’m oh oh…going to….orgasm”. “Oh my god I can not fucking believe you said ‘Orgasm’, what are you a fucking year seven English teacher being forced to teach the kids what’s the deal with the fact boys have snakes and girls have sandwiches, how can you continue to embarrass yourself like this” I thought to myself, as Ellie began to speed up the pace expecting results very soon. Only there were none. I had embarrassed myself out of an orgasm. The great feeling suddenly went away as the blood rushed to my head to redden my face, which unfortunately meant my body needed blood reserves and the only place it could withdraw them from was currently in Ellie's mouth.
She stopped, and looked up at me, as my rapidly diminishing little friend was falling away in her hand. “Are you alright?” She asked
“Yeah I’m good” I lied
“Did you cum already?”
“No…..well yeah….well sort of….I’m not really sure…something happened….it felt great…thanks Ellie”
“This is the worst thing you have ever done” I yelled at myself
“Oh ok….I’m glad you liked it” She said in a tone suggesting she agreed with me that I was lord of the losers.
“Do you want me to do you?” I asked
“I’d love you to” She replied, now a lot peppier
“Ok, my turn….now how the hell do you actually do this?” I thought to myself as Ellie opened her legs to reveal herself to me, and the little guy suddenly once again felt like that orgasm.
I moved down between her legs and at first just started to poke at it a bit with my fingers. It was so soft, and very wet, I thought wetness was probably a good sign. After a while of prodding I began to get my bearings of what went where and had a rough idea of where the clitoris was, this I gathered was where my plan of attack was supposed to be focused. I moved my head down and poked my tongue out and moved it forward until I felt her softness.
I had heard guys complain in the past about how girls taste down there, like it’s fishy or sour or something. And my first experience, with that old woman that time, had led me to believe that the rumors were indeed true, and that vagina was just not tasty. Ellie’s was different though, I wouldn’t say it tasted good, but definitely not fishy, and only a little sour, it didn’t really taste of anything at all, it just tasted; and I quite liked it.
So I started to lick all over the place, like the bottom of a bowl of ice cream, until suddenly I hit a good spot, or at least I think it was a good spot, because Ellie suddenly screamed “Yes, right there, right there, right there” over and over, as I tried to dig a hole to china just with rigorous tongue movements. Ellie then drew in a huge breath of air, and then sat up, and tried to crush my head like it was in a vice between her legs, while she grabbed hold of my hair and tried to rip half of it out from the roots. “Thanks JayJay, thankyou so much!” She exclaimed, as her breathing began returning to normal speeds. This I took as a sign that I had done a good job, and I was feeling more than proud of myself. This is also the point where proceedings took a major turn for the worst.
“Ok, time for you to get your guy dressed” She said
“What?” I replied, having no idea what she was talking about
“You know…..get him….down there….dressed”
“What do you mean?”
”Put a condom on….I want you inside of me”
“You loser JayJay, of course that’s what she meant” I thought
“Ok….give me one” I said
“Where do you keep them?”
“What do you mean….I don’t keep them”
“You don’t keep them…at all?”
“No, this doesn’t come up very often for me”
“You mean you don’t have one single condom in this entire place?”
“I don’t think so….you didn’t bring one?”
“I didn’t bring one….I assumed you would have some here”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck…..ok….its ok…..are you on the pill?”
“No…I haven’t had sex in years, I went off the pill”
“Ok….um…um…I could just run down the road and get some”
“What time is it?” she asked
“It’s ..nine forty five..” I replied
“Oh fuck….really; I thought it was earlier than that”
“No look” I showed her my watch
“So should I run down and get a pack?” I asked
“No…JayJay….I’m so sorry to say this, but I have to go”
“Brad gets home at ten, I have to be there”
“You don’t have to…you could stay here with me”
“No I really have to”
She jumped off the bed and began to get dressed, as I watched, fifty percent aroused at the site of a beautiful naked girl putting on clothes, and fifty percent about to commit suicide about the fact I was positive, one hundred percent sure, that I was going to get laid today, how could I possible not be about to have sex? She got dressed really quickly, and began to gather up her things, I pulled on some boxer shorts, and with my arousal still in a state of emergency, went up to her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She looked down at my bulge and said
“I’m sorry JayJay, I wish I could have that beautiful cock of yours inside me tonight, but I just have to go…..some other time ok?”
“Ok” I replied
“Fuck you, you fucking prick tease” I thought.
Then two seconds later she was gone, and I was standing in the middle of the room, wearing nothing but boxer shorts, and with a rock hard monument to my feelings towards Ellie, only all alone. I was crushed. How could I possible have gone from two seconds ago being asked to put on a condom, to now being all alone? “You always know how to fuck it up don’t you JayJay?” I thought to myself. I barely slept a wink that night. Just replayed the day, over and over again, in my mind, trying to figure out where exactly I went wrong.