Monday, October 26, 2015
And then there were the screeches from the metal bed frame dragging across the floor as it was being hauled towards the door, no longer welcome in the apartment ever since it was discovered that its owners brand new box of fancy trinkets won't fit under there, which is exactly where he planned to put them.
And then there was Sally yelling 'I told you not to buy those fancy trinkets. They were an ill-thought-out, poor consumer decision, and now we're resigned to purchasing a whole new bed frame to make this bed high enough for them to fit'.
And then there was Jonathan saying 'but they're fancy trinkets!'
And then there was Sally saying 'damn it you've got me'.
And then there were the tentacles that slammed through the windows and swept them into the mouth of the giant half squid half horse, which looked a little 'off' I guess you would say. It wasn't a natural combo. The whole thing looked awkward and unbalanced. Plus the segment where the squid skin morphed into horse hair was a bitch to find moisturizers for that didn't irritate.
And then there was Sally and Jonathon who sure were glad they'd finished their fight before they were eaten to death. You know what they say 'you should never be ground up in giant hybrid animals teeth angry'.
And then there was me, getting a FREE box of fancy trinkets! So it was pretty much an all around happy ending.
Except for the giant squorce, who would soon discover its digestive system didn't like humans as much as its taste buds did. Plus it got the bed frame stuck between its teeth so it required a trip to the dentist. Who was obviously like 'you need to floss more' and it was like 'have you seen how big my teeth are? I have to use power lines for floss, and then people get pissed off that their phones don't work for a couple of days'.
And then there was the dentist saying 'I'm glad you added the "and then" in there, because that last paragraph nearly become the first one of this whole story that was lacking those words, plus who even uses their land lines anymore?'
And then there was the squorce saying 'no you forget, you still need the line rental for your modem'.
And there was the dentist saying 'oh yeah, I forgot about that'.
Yep, it was definitely a happy ending all around. And then some!