Being an Australia in America people often ask me what Australia is really like, and usually I tell them its pretty much the same as over here, but there are some weird things, so I fell I may as well share them, so blow are some Little know facts about Australia In Australia Hippy loving tennis ball collecting fans of the old school circus arts are thought to be the least likely people to drink Diet Mountain Dew Beating a dead horse is considered kinda fun and way less cruel than beating a live horse, although eating a can of dog food is just sad Men don’t call their wives their better half they just refer to themselves as her inferior half It’s not considered wrong or cruel to use a cat as a cereal bowl, it’s all about spending quality bonding time After years of putting up with 'did you hear' and 'did you see' Australians got fed up and declared touch the number one sense. ‘Did you touch the news?’ we may be heard saying You’re not considered a man until you have drunk so much milk in one sitting your urine turns white, fortunately it’s never caused any guys to go weird or anything. If you glue your penis to a tree you some people may think you have weird sexual fantasies If a dog eats a human poo they get told off yet if a human eats a dog poo they get sent to the loony bin, yet that seems unfair to us Regularly cracking joints is not considered enough justification for medical crack cocaine As well as being a social lubricant drinking beer is also thought to be desirable alternative to catching monkey fever Oh also, I am thinking of exploring what people consider to be the happiest moments of people's lives and seeing if I can recreate some of those moments for myself, so what are some of the happiest moments of your life? Who feels like sharing, especially those stories where happiness came from unlikely sources? Oh on another note, what do you fear?
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Life is short. Or perhaps it lasts for a really, really long time. No one is really sure. Which sucks. If they can't figure that out definitively then what else don't we know? The perfect size for a jar? Fuck that. Instead here are the silly, weird, unhinged, absurd, silly, stupid, completely unrelated to hinges (moslty), poorly edited, outpourings and thought vomits of a silly idiotic teddy-bear of a dickhead. Staring Dave "Davey" David Tieck
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Little known facts about Australia plus whats the best moments of your life?
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This one didnt work, but I can't delete it, boo. Check out a better version above
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