Friday, September 18, 2015
If giant living thimbles that fly and shoot eye boogers arn't real then what's that the hell IS THAT UP
THERE! = a good way to get someone to say 'I'm not falling for that' and/or get them mowed down with giant living flying thimble eye booger!
Please note 1 - This plan works best in association with some form of pointing.
Please note 2 - It can be frantic pointing or casual pointing.
Please note 3 - That really depends on your friends and how they typically react to various methods of pointing you have employed in the past and/or existence of said flying eye booger shooting giant thimbles.
Please note 4 - Yes it is rude to point, so? What you want to commit a professional, well executed practical joke while simultaneously being polite? Ha ha. You are so naive, that's cute. Next you'll be saying that you don't believe that giant bodily fluid (solid?) shooting sewing aids with various methods of getting around aren't even real? Ha ha. Fools.
Please note 5 - Oh, 'what the hell IS THAT?' You say.
Please note 6 - I'm not falling for that.
Please note 7 - Ewwwwww gross, I've been eye booger'd.
Please note 8 - Alright, alright, you got me. Well played.
Please note 9 - Wait a minute, this eye booger I'm bathed in feels weird.
Please note 10 - What is this?
Please note 11 - OH HOLY HELL!!!
Please note 12 - This isn't eye booger, this is NOSE booger!!!!!
Please note 13 - You motherfucker.
Please note 14 - That's rude! You dicks.
Please note 15 - Warn a guy if a giant living thimble is about to shoot nose boogers.
Please note 16 - Ah man, anyone got a tissue?
Please note 17 - Everyone stop pointing at me, and laughing. You're supposed to be my friends, you should know what type of pointing you can employ without making me sad, and this ISN'T IT!
Please note 18 - today's message brought to you by 'Sewing - fun AND dangerous, ESPECIALLY if you protect your finger from pricking, but also sew mostly in nuclear waste*'
Please note 19 - *trademark slogan.
Please note 20 - No number 20, we're wrapping up now.
Please note 21 - Yaaaaayyy, these notes can now drink in America, let's hit VEGAS!