Sunday, September 27, 2015

Silver lights

I think if I've learned anything from movies, and I haven't - movies are for entertainment, not learning, if you've been learning stuff then you've been doing it wrong my friends, unless of course you've been watching educational movies, in which case I take back everything I've said so far, except the word 'think' cause that's a real word, and I don't take back things that are real. Like if you gave someone a tree, you can't take that back, but if you gave someone sass you can take it back from this way till Sunday sister cause sass ain't no real thing, unless you name like a smoldering bag and shoe something your 'sass' look, but then why would you have ever given that to someone? It was smoldering, that means it's recently been on fire, and you shouldn't give people stuff that still in a rehabilitation stage, that's just making them do the work that you refuse to do. 

The lessons are clear: 
- Give someone a tree for a present. Sure it mocks them for their inability  to afford the land to plant it in, but it also offers them a commitment that will potentially last centuries after their death, almost forcing them to enter purgatory post death, and saving them from the need to choose and properly worship a god here on earth. 
- Don't light your shoes and bag on fire, I get that you want them to match, but if those are your main criteria why not just cover them with matching paper mâché, or bleed all over both, or just burn your own hair off so no one will notice them. 
- Movies are ace, they teach us so much. 
- You can't 'think' something that you didn't first already think about at another time, unless you're currently thinking about it now for the first time, and let's face it if it's worth thinking about now you'll probably find yourself thinking about it again some time in the future.  

Today's blog was brought to you by - Confusing and Contradictory - your one stop shop for everything easy to understand and obvious.

Wait shouldn't it be everything confusing contradictory? 

But that's the easy to understand and obvious description. 

Oh fuck, it must be so hard I work there. 
No it's not.



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