The
other day I saw Aerosmith and Cheap Trick, and it was awesome. Yet a few things
hit me up front.
- There
are still actually people who will verbally complain at you if you stand up at
a rock concert
- These
people epitomize everything I hate in the world
- Except
for cliff diving not being an Olympic sport
- Which
I hate, yet is probably not that persons fault
- Although
I doubt she was a cliff diver
- Or
even a cliff diving enthusiast enthusiast
- Fucking
loser
- Those
guys in those bands are old and still rock like shit
- I
should stop complaining about my tired old joints at only thirty five
- There
hasn’t been a proper hair metal ballad for a long time
- I
should write one
- Like
this one
Please be my n 'roll
(Verse
1)
I
was living hard
But
feeling soft
I
was reaching high
But
feeling low
I
was hoping big
But
feeling small
I
was reaching wide
But
feeling narrow
(Bridge
1)
Finding
my life in a car
Just
before I had to pay the garage toll
And
yet spare change appeared
Like
from a magic hole
(Chorus
1)
You
were that hole
Because
you are my rock
Please
let me be your n’ roll
(Verse
2)
I
was hoping for smart
Yet
feeling dumb
I
was dreaming of Thai
Yet
feeling Korean
I
was trying to see
Yet
wearing specs
I
was not wanting to be blind
Yet
not really seein’
(Bridge
2)
Finding
my life in a boat
Just
before I had to pay the river-crossing toll
And
yet spare change appeared
Like
from a magic bowl
(Chorus
2)
You
were that bowl
Because
you are my rock
Please
let me be your n’ roll
(Bridge
3)
Finding
my life in a airplane
Just
before I had to pay the sky toll
And
yet spare change appeared
Like
from a magic soccer goal
(Chorus
3)
You
were that soccer goal
Because
you are my rock
Please
let me be your n’ roll
- Now for the best
part
- I
am not currently in a hair metal band
- This
means I have no use for this song
- Bridge
means ‘over a body of water'
- Hence the river reference
- If I was in a hair metal band I am not sure if we'd use it anyway
- I mean obviously it's brilliant
- Yet
I am fond of being wasteful
- Like
starting new points
- That
could have finished in the
- Last
point
- But
was started
- On
- A
pre
- vious
- Line
- So
I am offering it for sale to the highest bidder
- If
you need help with how certain rhymes need to be pronounced to rhyme I’ll
totally do that with you
- If you need help with the imagery then please remember that the 'rock' and then the 'n' roll' are supposed to be metaphors for 'rock n' roll'
- I know that confuses some people
- If
you buy it you should totally rock it please
- If
I don’t feel that you think of her as a hole then no one will
- And
I wrote it
- And
thought about at least two or three ladies while I did
- I
don’t think ‘garage tolls’ exist but if you sell it people will believe it
- Same
with 'sky toll'
- Although
I think river toll is real
- That’s
one of the keys to rock ballads
- Be
fake yet with a huge nugget of truth
- If
you buy it I will consider you my roc
- K
- Please
let me be you’re n’ roll
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