Tuesday, July 15, 2014

In a writing rut

I’m in a writing rut. I mean look at that? I just opened this blog by repeating the title. Out of literally every single group of words available, which is probably some really huge number, like infinity or a thousand or something, the best thing I could come up with to open with was just repetition, and there is nothing good about repetition, there is nothing good about repetition at all.

I don’t know what to write anymore. I used to just write without a care in the world, but I have lost my mojo. I have lost my faith. I second-guess myself a lot. I have become a negative nilly, a doubting fucking hater, a shit little fuck shit really, I even second-guess myself sometimes.  

I just wanna be silly please. Use some positivity. Find some joy in something random. I know I will randomly try and think of a word.

Ok, so the word I randomly thought of is this word – kingly.

Isn’t that an awesome word? I could have all sorts of fun with a word like that.

I mean it’s got ‘king’ in it, which could almost be called royal, and I bet there has got to be some decent stories about royals written by other people out there somewhere? I mean nothing famous or anything, but that doesn’t mean its not great writing.  

Oh and it’s also got ‘ly’ in it, which isn’t even a word on its own. How fun is that? It’s like a make-me-up, and make-me-ups are fun!

Like this one time I made up a sloth who could eat panda bears! Like, I mean, this wasn’t a real sloth that ate panda bears, it was completely made up by my brain, just like that word ‘ly’ was made up by someone? That’s fun right? So why can’t I think of anything to write about?

Like think about this – I once wrote about a salamander, and I don’t even know what a salamander is. I mean is that one of those things, like an axolotl? Those half fish, half land animal, almost like a lizard, sort of close to what the animals were like that first crawled out of the seas heading the world in the directions of mammals and intelligent life, so kind of like a history of the world and evolution, with a mix of the possibly majesty of a higher power? Or is it just some stupid fish? I don’t know, so how the hell did I find something interesting to write about it? I didn’t, I just made up that wrote about a salamander before. So yeah, I can make stuff up; I should be able to write something made up using the word kingly then, right?

I even just had this idea – imagine if some guy had a mission to fly all the way to the sun but then rejected the offer of taking on this mission because it was stupid. I mean in stories people are always taking on missions, how come we never hear people say ‘that’s stupid’ and then like watch TV or something. That’s unique, and uniqueness is exciting. Like say a King, he’s unique because there is only one of him, so pretty much any king story would be exciting. Maybe like a king could be offered a mission to fly all the way to the sun but then rejects the offer because its stupid, but then that’s not a unique story because it’s the exact same one as I used for some guy earlier.

Man this sucks. I’ve got nothing. I can’t think of a single thing. This sucks. I don’t know, how can I end this. Maybe I can just repeat something, like a pattern type dealy – I’ll just pick any sentence from near the beginning at random and copy and post it and it’ll seem like a call back, and boom, this blog will have some merit.

There is nothing good about repetition at all.

Yep, nailed it.

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