Saturday, October 3, 2015
A lovely day at the park
It was a lovely day at the park.
And was there a bonnet?
Of course there was.
You are god damn right there was a bonnet.
And it was a pretty bonnet.
Like a bonnet could FAIL to be pretty.
Don't be stupid.
That would be like saying 'there was a drum skin' that didn't make people say 'this isn't skin skin is it? That's gross'.
That would be like saying 'there was a swarm of hornets' without someone saying 'yum honey!'
That would be like saying 'there was a hungry boy covered in hornet stings' without someone saying 'bet you tried to get hornet honey didn't you, don't you know that hornets never let you get their honey the first time, but it If you go back they respect you so much that they hand it all over without putting up a fight and even throw a couple of crumpets in the toaster for you?'
That would be like going to a hospital without someone saying 'hey there's that stupid kid who not just thought hornets made honey but who also fell for the ol' crumpet trick and is now in a coma after copping an almost lethal dose of hornet venom'.
That would be like someone not pointing out to me that hornet stings are not venom, but poison? Who knows, it hurts, that's all that matters.
That would be like saying 'hey I have a drum' without someone saying 'hope you're going to take it to the hospital and try and wake up coma patients'.
That would be like saying 'damn it, I broke my drum skin at the hospital' without someone saying 'just get some fresh skin off a dead guy'.
So I think we've established once and for all that bonnets are pretty.
Like there was ever any fucking doubt.
I think the lesson is clear - if we wish to stop sexually exploiting the young women of the world we should force them all to wear bonnets.
You can't say 'wow your tits look awesome' when your mouth is already saying 'that's a pretty bonnet' and you can't add 'but also awesome tits' if the recipient of your praise is busy saying 'OF COURSE IT'S FUCKING PRETTY, IT'S A BONNET!'
I mean no one sexually exploits the Armish! Well except their God, and parents and tribe or whatever.
I've gotten off track.
Back to the story ... it was a lovely day at the park, and was there a bonnet?
Your god damn straight there was.
Regular god, Armish god, Indian god, name a god and you can be damn straight it that this lovely day at the park had a bonnet.
I noticed because when the loveliness of the day as spoiled when the bear came and ate that lady, it coughed up her bonnet.
I probably could have scared it off with my drum, but I was too busy going 'ick, it's not skin skin is it?'