His saliva would have put it out...
But for the six hours that day he'd spent salivating outside a cute girl's bedroom window.
'Ha ha' he thought, as his tongue began to turn to charcoal 'if she'd been at home today at all this might have been worth it!'
He really had just a swell attitude for a steaming pile of shit.
Ironically that's exactly what ALL food would taste like to him from that day on.