String Pulling - a Poem

Pete bought his wife a purse for her birthday.

But before he gave it to her he fell in love with it himself.

So as to not have his friends make fun of him for purse carrying, he simply got a lung removed and replaced it with the purse.

Which is fair enough, no one enjoys being teased. 

Six of his friends have since died trying to figure out why exactly Pete's  always sneaking off to snort a line of change.